Hi all Finally getting some summer down here in the Cape. Only two new releases this week, both aimed at the adult market. First up, and judging by the truckload of awards and nominations, what may be a top contender come Oscar time, is the female-interest arthouse release The Lost Daughter, which also marks Maggie Gyllenhaal's big-screen directorial debut. On the mass market (or is that mass murder) side, we have the 5th episode in the venerable Scream franchise, bringing some of the original cast back for more thrills. Enjoy :-) New this week: * The Lost Daughter (16 LNSV) * Scream )18 LVH) https://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm Forthcoming attractions https://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm Updated the pic and quote on the home page https://www.moviesite.co.za/ This Week's pinup https://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (full HD wallpaper ...) List of all movies showing https://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm Same list sorted by Age Restriction https://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm Showtimes https://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) Enjoy :-) Cheers, Ian --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Breaking news: A man was admitted to the hospital today with 23 plastic toy horses inserted in his rectum. Doctors have described his condition as stable. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Dad: What is the opposite of ladyfingers? The family: No idea Dad: Mentos --------------------------------------------------------------------------- My granddad always used to say, "As one door closes, another one opens..." Lovely man, terrible cabinet maker. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was on a train and this woman opposite looked at me and said, "Every time you smile, I feel like inviting you to my place..." I asked "Are you single?" She replied "No, I'm a dentist." --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wife: I'm leaving you. Me: Is it because I act like I know everything? Wife: Yes. Me: I knew it. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Wife: "Honey let's play a game?" Husband: "Ok, what is the game all about?" Wife: "If I mention a country, you will run to the left side of the room and touch the wall. And if I mention a bird you will run to the right side of the room and touch the wall. If you run to the wrong direction, you will give me all your salary for the month." Husband: "Ok and if you fail, I will have your salary too right?" Wife: (smile) "Yes darling." Husband: "Ok" (stood up and was ready to run to any direction) Wife: "Are u ready?" Husband: "Yes, ready." Wife: "Turkey" It has been 4 hours now the husband is still standing at the spot wondering if she meant the country or the bird. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Waiter: "How do you like your steak, sir?" Sir: "Like winning an argument with my wife." Waiter: "Rare it is." --------------------------------------------------------------------------- One night a Viking named Rudolph the Red was looking out the window when he said, "It's going to rain." His wife asked, "How do you know?" "Because Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear." --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I never wanted to believe my brother was stealing from his job as a road worker. But when I got home, all the signs were there. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I would make a Sodium joke. But Na. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- My math teacher called me average... How mean! --------------------------------------------------------------------------- I dig, you dig, we dig, he digs, she digs, they dig. It's not a beautiful poem, but it's very deep... --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Aladdin has been banned from the magic carpet race. Apparently he's been using performance enhancing rugs... --------------------------------------------------------------------------- At a parole hearing, the officer asked, "Tell me, why should you be released early?" The inmate responded, "It's bec..." Officer: Yes? Inmate: I think I have.. Officer: Go on. Inmate: Can I Please finish my sentence? Officer: Sure. Parole denied. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office. I will find you. You have my Word.