Hi all Alright, Saturday afternoon already ... last half of the week was rather hectic, finally catching up. Over at the movies we have the latest installment in the Star Trek series, which got generally good reviews even if it didn't set any box office records. So there will probably be another episode in due course :-) Speaking of records and reviews, Suicide Squad got so-so reviews all over but is doing very well at the box office, both here and in the USA. We'll have to see if it can fend off the Trekkies this week. Also up this week are two new SA releases, aimed at dramatically different markets. Rounding out the lineup we have the second episode in the rebooted Mechanic series, which has been kept away from the press before release, as well as a family movie which unfortunately has been poorly received. Lastly we have a Jaws-type story, and a new Bollywood release. Enjoy :-) M O V I E S Released 16 August 2016 * Star Trek Beyond (PG10-12 V) * Star Trek Beyond (3D) (PG10-12 V) * Star Trek Beyond (3D)(IMAX) (PG10-12 V) * Star Trek Beyond (4DX) (PG10-12 V) * Mechanic: Resurrection (16 LV) * Dis Koue Kos, Skat (13 L) * Nine Lives (PG) * Dora's Peace (16 LV) * The Shallows (16 VH) * A Flying Jatt (Hindi) http://www.moviesite.co.za/new.htm SA Top Tens (commercial, Nouveau, best and worst movies on circuit) http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm The US and UK Top Tens. Industry news updated daily. http://www.moviesite.co.za/news/newsitem.htm Showtimes (all Ster-Kinekor, Nu Metro, MovieZone, CineCentre, Movies@, Labia) http://www.moviesite.co.za/where.htm Forthcoming attractions for 2 September. http://www.moviesite.co.za/4thcome.htm Updated the pic and quote on the home page http://www.moviesite.co.za/ This Week's pinup http://www.moviesite.co.za/pinup.html (for the guys) Pick of the Week http://www.moviesite.co.za/pick.htm All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first. http://www.moviesite.co.za/where/previews.htm List of all movies showing http://www.moviesite.co.za/reviews.htm Same list sorted by Age Restriction http://www.moviesite.co.za/showingbyage.htm Top Ten and Worst Ten Movies by Critical Rating http://www.moviesite.co.za/topten.htm Remember you can support the site by reading the ads... :-) Cheers, Ian -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Had great difficulty finding jokes this week... perhaps all the troubles in the world are reflected in the lack of new humour. A man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a beer. He enjoys his beer for some time, until a voice reaches his ears, "Mate, love your haircut". Perplexed, he looks around, and sees only the regulars at the far end of the bar. Deciding it might have been someone leaving, he continues drinking. Not too long after, he hears the voice again, "Nice shirt buddy, goes with the hair". Truly bewildered he calls over the barman and asks him what's going on, who's talking to him? The barman looks at him then points at a bowl on the bar, "Don't stress mate -- that's just the complimentary peanuts". -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- A model railway in the park near us caught fire yesterday. The flames could be seen nearly five feet away. If you're chased by a police dog, don't go through a tunnel, on a little seesaw & jump through a hoop of fire. They're trained for that. Stopped a woman for dodgy driving. "where are your glasses" I said. "I have contacts" she said. "Don't threaten me!" I replied. -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Just remember some of us will get there too.... Just before the funeral services, the undertaker came up to the very elderly widow and asked, 'How old was your husband?' '98,' she replied, 'Two years older than me' 'So you're 96,' the undertaker commented. She responded , 'Hardly worth going home, is it? Reporter interviewing a 104-year-old woman: 'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter asked. She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.' The nice thing about being senile is You can hide your own Easter eggs. I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, So I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, By the time I got my leotards on, The class was over. My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out. It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker. These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, ' For fast relief.' -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The duffer muffed his tee shot into the woods, then hit into a few trees, then proceeded to hit across the fairway into another woods. Finally, after banging away several more times, he proceeded to hit into a sand trap. All the while, he'd noticed that the club professional had been watching. "What club should I use now?" he asked the pro. "I don't know," the pro replied. "What game are you playing?" -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. "I want to become a lawyer. How much is it or the express degree you told me about?" "It's $50,000," the lawyer said. "But why? You'll be dead soon, why do you want to become a lawyer?" "That's my business! Get me the course!" Four days later, the old man got his law degree. His lawyer was at his bedside, making sure his bill would be paid. Suddenly the old man was racked with fits of coughing and it was clear that this would be the end. Still curious, the lawyer leaned over and said, "please, before it's too late, tell me why you wanted to to get a law degree so badly before you died?" In a faint whisper, as he breathed his last, the old man said, "One less lawyer . . ." -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Washington, DC Metro Station on a cold January morning in 2007. The man with a violin played six Bach pieces for about 45 minutes. During that time approx. 2 thousand people went through the station, most of them on their way to work. After 3 minutes a middle aged man noticed there was a musician playing. He slowed his pace and stopped for a few seconds and then hurried to meet his schedule. 4 minutes later: The violinist received his first dollar: a woman threw the money in the hat and, without stopping, continued to walk. 6 minutes: A young man leaned against the wall to listen to him, then looked at his watch and started to walk again. 10 minutes: A 3-year old boy stopped but his mother tugged him along hurriedly. The kid stopped to look at the violinist again, but the mother pushed hard and the child continued to walk, turning his head all the time. This action was repeated by several other children. Every parent, without exception, forced their children to move on quickly. 45 minutes: The musician played continuously. Only 6 people stopped and listened for a short while. About 20 gave money but continued to walk at their normal pace. The man collected a total of $32. 1 hour: He finished playing and silence took over. No one noticed. No one applauded, nor was there any recognition. No one knew this, but the violinist was Joshua Bell, one of the greatest musicians in the world. He played one of the most intricate pieces ever written, with a violin worth $3.5 million dollars. Two days before Joshua Bell sold out a theater in Boston where the seats averaged $100. This is a true story. Joshua Bell playing incognito in the metro station was organized by the Washington Post as part of a social experiment about perception, taste and people's priorities . The questions raised: in a common place environment at an inappropriate hour, do we perceive beauty? Do we stop to appreciate it? Do we recognize talent in an unexpected context? One possible conclusion reached from this experiment could be this: If we do not have a moment to stop and listen to one of the best musicians in the world, playing some of the finest music ever written, with one of the most beautiful instruments ever made ... How many other things are we missing? --------------------------------------------------------------------------------