The Moviesite Updates, 15 February 2013

Written by admin on 15 February 2013 – 13:13 -

Hi all

Another Oscar hopeful opens this week (and another Oscar loses hope…).
The film has attracted controversy over its torture scenes, as well as the
whole premise of the film. There is considerable evidence that OBL died in
late 2001 of kidney failure.

Bruce is back as well, but no one expects any Oscars for this release…


Released 15 February 2013

* Quartet (10-12PG L)
* Zero Dark Thirty (16 LV)
* A Good Day to Die Hard (16 LV)

SA Top Tens (commercial, nouveau, best and worst movies on circuit)

Added US Top Ten.

Showtimes (all Ster-Kinekor, Nu Metro, MovieZone, CineCentre,
Movies@, and Menlyn Park drive-ins.)

Forthcoming attractions for 22 February and 1 March

Updated the pic and quote on the home page

This Week’s pinup (for the teenage boys)

Pick of the Week

All the previews. Remember to check with the cinema first.

List of all movies showing

Same list sorted by Age Restriction

Top Ten and Worst Ten Movies by Critical Rating

DVDs and BluRays:

New releases will be up later at

Remember you can support the site by reading the ads… :-)

Cheers, Ian


Never let it be said that there is a tragedy which the comedians will
respect and ignore. Following the fatal shooting early on 14 Feb, the
jokes were soon circulating…. Our condolences to the deceased’s family.

Roses are red,
Violets are glorious,
Don’t try to surprise
Oscar Pistorius.

She didn’t notice Oscar sneaking up behind her. It was the silence of the

New evidence has been found outside the Pistorious home that completely
acquits him of his girlfriend’s murder.

Oscar Pistorius. Not the first South African with a race problem.

When Oscar Pistorius said he wanted to be just like able bodied athletes,
who knew he meant OJ Simpson?

Absolutely shocking news from South Africa.
White man arrested for murder.

Oscar Pistorius. Just because he has no legs doesn’t mean he’s unarmed.

What did Oscar Pistorius get for Valentine’s day?…
20 years.


Ageing …

A distraught senior citizen phoned her doctor’s office.
“Is it true,” she wanted to know, “that the medication you prescribed has
to be taken for the rest of my life?”
“‘Yes, I’m afraid so,”‘ the doctor told her.
There was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied,
“I’m wondering, then, just how serious is my condition because this
prescription is marked ‘NO REFILLS’.”

An older gentleman was on the operating table awaiting surgery and he
insisted that his son,
a renowned surgeon, perform the operation.
As he was about to get the anesthesia, he asked to speak to his son.
“Yes, Dad, what is it?”
“Don’t be nervous, son; do your best, and just remember, if it doesn’t go
well, if something happens to me, your mother is going to come and live
with you and your wife….”

When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth, think of

First you forget names, then you forget faces.
Then you forget to pull up your zipper….
It’s worse when you forget to pull it down.


Two guys, one old, one young, are pushing their carts around Wal-Mart when
they collide.

The old guy says to the young guy, “Sorry about that. I’m looking for my
wife, and I guess I wasn’t paying attention to where I was going.”

The young guy says, “That’s OK, it’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my
wife, too…I can’t find her and I’m getting a little desperate.”

The old guy says, “Well, maybe I can help you find her…what does she look

The young guy says, “Well, she is 27 yrs. old, tall, with red hair, blue
eyes, is buxom…wearing no bra, long legs, and is wearing short shorts.
What does your wife look like?’

To which the old guy says, “Doesn’t matter, — let’s look for yours.”


My dad worked on the roadwork’s for twenty years before he got fired for
At first I didn’t believe it… but when I got home all the signs were


Everyone’s a comedian nowadays. Even the paramedic who was unable to
resuscitate Whitney couldn’t avoid a gag!

When he radioed dispatch he said “It’s Houston, we have a problem!”


P.O. Box 484, Sanlamhof 7532, South Africa
The Moviesite at
South Africa’s greatest movie site.

Posted in Jokes, Newsletter | No Comments »

Bookmark this page or share it with others

Post a Comment